Date: 29-03-2026

Time: 12:37

What if I tell you that each release and era of Melanie Martinez albums (I'm a fan since 2016, when I was 10, and she was the first artist I became a fan of) coincided with phases of my life? I've always connected so deeply to her music, it truly resonates with my soul - if my soul made a sound, it would feel similar to her works, a lot of times she just straight up speaks my mind. The Cry Baby era did really fit with the kind of stuff I liked back in the day and Crybaby was the type of character and had a story that meant a lot to me. I really loved that album a lot. Then, K-12 came out when I was in 8th grade, and it was the year I truly felt I had walked out of my childhood and started noticing the world with a bit more attentive eyes and sensitivity; K-12 in Crybaby's story is exactly that, the school represents her being exposed to the world outside her home/family and being inserted in society, no longer living so isolated with only her pain. That was also the year I stared liking History for real, and now that's what I study in college.

Portals released in my graduation year. Highschool was a time when I started getting involved with spirituality, and the album addressed stuff that I was already aware of so I was like... Mel, are you stalking me? It was a "weird" (different) era, and for me it was a weird time in life. Crybaby was dead and I was seeing the end of a decade long life phase. And now, Hades got released! It's soooo good, Melanie had never sounded better (voice and music). Everything sounds heavenly. Hades addresses the cruelty and the hypocrisy of the world we live in, burning the open wounds... and it's just what I've been thinking, reading and writing about for some months. It's about questioning everything too. And I'm so glad she's singing about it all, we need to talk about things. I think Hades proves her music has matured.

I get the vision the albums grew up with me: Cry Baby is the childhood, K-12 the pre-teen years, Portals brings the state between death and rebirth, so I think it can match with adolescence.. Hades is a new cycle, vision and style. It exposes the grief feeling I'm actually carrying in the present about almost everything I came to know in life. Well, there's "beauty in garbage". I'm with high hopes for the MM5 later this year.

That's it, I think Melanie is a sweetheart and has an amazing unique style, her music will always be meaningful to me and loved. Oh, she also obv helped me learning english.

Mood:     gave up

Song:     hades full album

Eating:   just had lunch :)

Date: 15-03-2026

Time: 08:42

Soo I should be studying for college rn but I wasn't expecting to still be so lazy despite being in the course I like lol. Anyways, when I woke up this morning, there was a bee tring to enter forcingfully through a small gap in the closed window. When it made it through I opened the window anyway and went to the bathroom (inside room) to do my stuff bc what else could I do. So, it was the bee having fun flying around and me in a separated space moving on. Until. The very same bee (bc when I came back to my room it wasn't there anymore) entered. The. Bathroom. By its window. Which is considerably far from the outside. Folks, it didn't want to simply enter my home. It was after me (I don't have any flowers and never use perfume though). Well, I knocked it out with a towel and while the poor weirdo was laying dizzy I threw both out the window (it fell in the yard). Later I remembered the Bee Movie LOL.

Edit 10h: IT CAME BACK. WHAT.

Uhm the other story happened about two years ago ig. I was chilling at home when suddenly a butterfly came inside, flying still in the same spot in the air for some seconds, at the same height as my face. It was like it came to say something to me lolllll. Then, the butterfly went away, flying lower.... directly in my cat's face. My cat didn't even see it before, the butterfly just went to certain death at purely free will. So my cat ate it immediately. That's it. A butterfly spoke to me (I didn't hear) and killed itself in front of me...

What's up with these insects nowadays?!

Mood:     under pressure

Song:     The Giver - Chappell Roan

Eating:   pão com frios e leite com nescau

Date: 16-02-2026

Time: 17:10

Why did I make a Touhou shrine if I don't actually like Touhou? It's gone now.

Mood:     bored

Song:     Vai Passar - Chico Buarque

Eating:   nothing

Date: 25-01-2025

Time: 16:42

Let me describe my January (new stuff):

Movies/series: Alice (1988), Beauty and the Beast (1978), Versailles no Bara, Hana Kimi, Ikoku Nikki (plan to watch: The Magic Flute; add edit 30/01: Be My Angel)

Music: Malice Mizer < 3, Lareine, Versailles, basicallly discovered visual kei

I noticed Malice Mizer songs with classical music referenced in them: Madrigal (Mozart's Rondo Alla Turca at 2:28) and Baroque (Beethoven's Fur Elise at 4:13).

Sadly, if you may forgive this contradiction of mine, I could only find out about vkei bc of my return to ig (and this includes their short videos feature, where suddenly a fanart of the unknown to me Malice Mizer appeared randomly). Just how am I to find about such specific cool stuff without social media? I'd have to ask the angels while doing something almost equivalent of exploring a new continent on the internet, cause I've never used it like the people who did in the 90s/2000's, forums are quite niche. And we can't quite rely on local magazines and tv now for the issue. Well, the point is, things don't have to be fully evil... all I need is to behave, no matter where. Also I have a much bigger problem now, having developed a huge fear of driving (nothing happened). Uh oh.

But do you want some actual good news? For real lately, I'm doing fine! I'm learning how to not get overwhelmed by things, people or myself. Please, brain, keep giving me dreams with stars, it always makes my day. Some people get mesmerized by stuff like flowers, but things hardly make that kind of effect on me, only music (and instruments/people playing them and singers who are pratically out of this world) and... stars! Despite this, I don't know shit. Do you need to have knowledge or understanding to appreciate things? I guess I'm okay to just look at it like an impressed animal. It's okay, it's truly fun. May I learn something anyday though.

Mood:     sunday existencial crisis

Song:     MALICE MIZER - Syunikiss〜二度目の哀悼

Eating:   bread

Date: 25-12-2025

Time: 17:53

Here's something about Deltarune that I've noticed a while ago:

Mood:     bored

Song:     dingle bell

Eating:   nothing

Date: 15-12-2025

Time: 14:22

Mood:     nostalgic

Song:     hello goodbye hello goodbye hello goodbye...

Eating:   pão amassado

Date: 02-11-2025

Time: 16:25

I'll use this entry to register the shows that I'm currently watching so I won't get lost.

1. Revolutionary Girl Utena
2. Star Trek TOS
3. The Chosen

Mood:     unquiet

Song:     stupid music that won't stop in my brain

Eating:   leite com nescau

Date: 01-11-2025

Time: 09:30

[PRIMEIRA ENTRADA EM PT-BR. Not in the mood para inglês :v]

Esse ano vejo o mês como mais empolgante do que dezembro. Por quê? Às vezes nossas expectativas são tão exigentes que a véspera acaba nos emocionando mais do que o evento em si; dezembro já é o mês que fecha o ano e também tem o natal, quando experimentamos tal clima. Em novembro nos assustamos com o quão rápido mais um ano passou e nos preparamos pra dezembro. Como estaremos nas festas de fim de ano? Ainda temos energia no penúltimo mês, para então passar o último suspirando de cansaço e alívio.

Comecei a ver os filmes do Monty Python (gostei bastante da aula de latim "romani ite domum"). Só achei dublado por enquanto, então tô perdendo quase todas as piadas. :(

[Edit 16:08]: Joguei um jogo interessante hoje. (Akai Mori no Majo)

Sempre me sinto muito nostálgica quando vejo algo relacionado a vocaloid. ♡

Mood:     Idiota, quebrei um copo lavando louça

Song:     Echoes - Pink Floyd

Eating:   Panqueca de ovo e banana e ingredientes essenciais para fazer uma panqueca

Date: 23-10-2025

Time: 11:13

I think Paul McCartney sounds like Paul Stanley in this part of "Oh! Darling":

"The Trooper" by Iron Maiden and "Lost One's Weeping (ロストワンの号哭)" by Neru have similar guitar riffs.

Chappell Roan's yeah yeah yeah in "Guilty Pleasure" reminds me of "She Loves You" everytime I listen to it.

Mood:     My left eye hurts

Song:      All of the above

Eating:    Air

Date: 21-10-2025

Time: 11:38

There's a Kirk's quote of Star Trek TOS "THE CORBOMITE MANUVER", which I watched yesterday's night, that I liked: "Those of you who have served for long on this vessel have encountered alien life forms. You know the greatest danger facing us is ourselves and irrational fear of the unknown, but there's no such a thing as the unknown. Only things temporarily hidden, temporarily not understood."

There was an alien threatening to destroy Enterprise in 10 minutes, but not even one of those were wasted in despair by the command crew (except for Bailey). It doesn't mean they weren't scared, but despite this, Kirk, as the captain, never dropped his confidence, showed weakness to his crew or gave up. The crew just waits and follows their captain's orders in silence, even with great danger so close.

Kirk also asks McCoy later, "Ready, doctor?" and Bones answers, "No, but don't let it stop you" (brazilian dub). No matter how much you're scared, don't let it make you lose control or paralyze. It makes a bit more sense when you remember those who advice to live life as if we were going to die very soon.

Hey, I noticed something:

Mood:     Normal?

Song:     Young Girl A - Siinamota

Eating:   Nothing

Date: 20-10-2025

Time: 12:32

"Oh my poor sweet dumb fcking Phoenix Wright"

I HATE THIS MF COMPHET. THIS SHIT IS LIKE SOME FOLCLORIC DEMON. Like why is it so difficult to accept the truth huh why would I even need men in my life in that way if I don't even like them, stop doubting yourself.

But I don't seem to be able to overcome this to this day, it comes and goes, like I could never be sure about myself but I CAN. And I pretty much am. My comphet is in fact really strong.

Hope to be healing better soon.

I've been playing Hell Maiden's demo, it's cool as hell (lol) but I can't beat Queen Minos. Virgil is soooo pretty

Mood:     Broken lesbian heart 

Song:     Varinha de Condão - Carrossel

Eating:   Just had lunch oh ye

Date: 05-10-2025

Time: 16:30

I made a new page for showing my OCs. That's all.

Mood:     Grey

Song:     Phosphor - OneShot OST 04

Eating:   Nothing

Date: 04-10-2025

Time: 17:00

Who said you need to write all of the day in only one entry? Like I'll truly use this frequently. I got interested in Star Trek in 2022 but didn't feel like watching TOS. Now I'm calmly watching the episodes and understanding them for real, even watching the brazilian dub instead of subtitled (the 70s portuguese sounds appealing...).

I still love Spock (Leonard Nimoy) a lot and like to learn about him. Like, he's half human (bc mother), I didn't know that. In episode 5, when every infected person shows their biggest weakness, Spock loses control of his emotions and cries a lot, admitting that he regrets not having ever said to his mother that he loved her and that he's ashamed of considering Kirk his friend. I'm fangirling.

Also, I made these drawings in 2022 and 2025:

Mood:    Happy bc ST

Song:     The Dead Dance - Lady Gaga

Eating:   Nothing, belly full :)

Date: 04-10-2025

Time: 16:35

Ok, finally the first entry of this blog is here. I may use this eventually now, when I remember its existence. Did you know the first made shrine of this site was the Beatles one (ofc it looked different back then)? Followed by [LONG DELETED ANIME SHRINE] Little Goody Two Shoes and the moths/butterflies.

I wanted to register that I'm currently seduced by Lady Gaga. Here's my playlist:

1. Judas (Born This Way)
2. Bad Romance (The Fame Monster)
3. Abracadabra (MAYHEM)
4. Bloody Mary (Born This Way)
5. Donatella (ARTPOP)
6. Poker Face (The Fame)
7. The Dead Dance (MAYHEM)
8. Born This Way
9. Paparazzi (The Fame)
10. Venus (ARTPOP)
11. SheiBe (Born This Way)
12. Garden Of Eden (MAYHEM)

Mood:    Bored

Song:     Abracadabra - Lady Gaga

Eating:   Pão de queijo (sério)